Cindy and her 5 year old son moved in with her parents 8 years ago. Back then, her parents were in their 70s and both enjoyed good health. They loved doting on their grandson. Now Cindy’s mom has poor health due to diabetes and two strokes; her dad has developed Alzheimer’s.
Cindy and her now 13 year old son still live with her mom and dad, but she is providing all the care and support for everyone in the house. After her parents took care of her for so many years and then took her and her son in and took care of them, she feels like everything is upside down. She is now the caregiver for two elderly adults as well as mother to her teenage son.
None of Cindy’s siblings live close enough to help with the everyday tasks of life. They lend support over the phone and have volunteered to pitch in with finances should Cindy have to put her parents in some kind of long-term care. She really doesn’t want to move them out of their own home. Feeling desperate, Cindy contacted in-home care service to see what her options were.
Cindy was surprised and pleased to find out that hiring a caregiver to come into the home and help her look after her parents cost less than putting both of them into a nursing home. Her parents savings would pay for the cost; Cindy just had to make all the arrangements with home care services.
Wanting to do more to help, her sister in Florida volunteered to switch places with Cindy for two weeks every summer. Cindy and her son could go to Florida and live in her sister’s house for a great (and inexpensive!) summer vacation while Cindy’s sister stayed at the home and visited with her parents, managed the caregiving situation, etc.
Don’t push yourself to the edge of desperation as a caregiver. Your situation may seem hopeless to you but somebody else may see a way for you to get a break. Don’t be afraid to ask friends and family members for help. Even when you think none of them could possibly help you, they might just surprise you and come up with something very helpful.
Reach out for help when you need it. If your closest circle of friends and family has nothing to offer you, reach out a little further. There are neighbors, community groups and online forums where you can get information, ideas and moral support. Don’t discount any offers of help, no matter how small they may seem. They all add up. When the giver realizes how good it felt to give help, they will be more eager to do it again.
About Zack McConnell
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